Today is the first day of Week 8 in my Quest to Make the Acquaintance of My Inner Skinny Girl. You know — the one that’s been hiding under several (hundred) layers of Stress and Rejection and Pain and Lies Religious People have Told Me (that I was stupid enough to believe) and Self-Loathing.
You know — that illusive creature who once in a great while might peek out to see what’s going on, but the second anybody says or does anything that feels even remotely prickly or pokey or potentially harmful, she scurries back into hiding. It’s safer there.
Sort of. It might feel safer on some levels. If you’re hiding, you don’t have to risk experiencing emotional pain. Or so you might think. There’s always the chance that some hateful soul will watch you walking down the street and holler about how you need to go on a diet.
It’s been 7 full weeks since I first set out to find the elusive Skinny Girl. It’s been such a great experience! I’ve learned a lot. I’ve lost a lot of weight. Twenty pounds, to be exact. I feel so much better — on so many levels.
I’m a studious girl, so I want to share some of the things I’ve learned since the last time I posted on the topic of Things I’ve Learned.
I’ve learned that there are a couple weeks during a month that a girl should avoid weighing herself — unless her goal is to gain weight, in which case she would avoid weighing during the weeks that people like me enjoy weighing. During my most recent Don’t Weigh Week, I had been so busy (which equals doing a lot more walking than normal) and had been so careful about what I ate. I was really excited to step on the scale because I anticipated that I’d lose a decent amount that week. I stepped on the scale and much to my astonishment, I had gained 3 pounds. Three pounds. I think I actually cried.
After sopping up the tears, I was determined. Determined that I didn’t care that much anyway and life goes on. The next week I sat in my chair a lot. I had a lot of stuff I needed to get done that didn’t involve exercise, and I was sort of in survival mode. I ate what was in front of me. I counted calories, but I didn’t make too much effort in trying to keep my calorie consumption as low as normal.
And the next week, I lost the three pounds plus a couple more. It was a little bewildering.
Maybe I wasn’t eating enough the week before. Or it might be related to fluids. But what I learned is that one should never give up, simply because one week doesn’t go well. The next week could very well make up for it.
Another thing I’ve learned is that you don’t have to eat full portions. I went to Subway the other day and I wanted more than just a sandwich, so I got a sandwich and some sun chips. Sun chips are a middle-of-the-road choice, calorie-wise. I didn’t want to eat that many calories at the same time, so I ate half of the chips. I was satisfied. I ate the other half for a snack later. I found that eating a small serving of sun chips after work filled me up enough that I didn’t need to eat so much for supper. Apparently, what they say about eating more frequent, smaller meals is true. Who knew?
Finally, I’ve learned that sometimes, a girl should just kick back and eat pizza and cake and ice cream (in moderation, of course) when the opportunity arises. It’s ok. You won’t die and, if you enjoy them in moderation, it won’t negatively affect your weight-loss goals. You gotta live sometime, and it might as well be today, right?