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Category Archives: Profundities

Matters of The Heart

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked. (Jeremiah 17:9)

We’ve heard it a thousand times.

I really like that house. I want to find a way to buy it.
The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked.

But I want a cookie!
The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked.

It would be nice to be friends with him….
The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked.

That’s a really nice car!
The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked.

I want to be someone’s mom….
The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked.

I need to take some time to rest.
The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked.

The verse from Jeremiah 17 often gets applied in ways that make a person doubt their hopes, desires and needs. Applied incorrectly, it can cause a person to push themselves beyond what is healthy and good.

If something is dear to you, that means it’s a bad thing because The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked.

Applied incorrectly, this verse leads a person to strive in ways that are unhealthy.

Brownies….. Love me some chocolate! But…. The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked! I guess my snack is going to be a glass of water today….

As I’ve been thinking about this verse, it occurred to me that, that was then. Then, as in, at a time in history when people trusted themselves and did not trust God. Jeremiah 17:5 says “Cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength, whose heart departs from the Lord.”

That — deceitful and wicked hearts — that was then.

This is now.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. (II Corinthians 5:17)

There was a time in history when hearts were deceitful and desperately wicked.

Before Jesus and the gospel of Grace.

The Old Testament is full of examples of deceit and wickedness.
Think Amnon and Tamar.
David and the incident involving Bathsheeba.
Joseph’s brothers selling him into slavery.
Jezebel.
Haman trying to kill all the Jewish people.
Jonah refusing to warn the people of Ninevah.

And in our own personal lives, yes, at one time, our hearts were deceitful and desperately wicked.

At one time, we too were once foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving various lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life. Titus 3:3-7

Regeneration.
Renewal.

Jesus makes all things new.

All things. Including our hearts.

If Jesus is in you and you are truly seeking Him, it is impossible for your heart to remain “deceitful and desperately wicked.”

I encourage you to trust Jesus in you instead of worrying about what your heart used to be without Him.

 
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Posted by on June 12, 2016 in Profundities

 

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On Being a Woman

I’ve been reading this book the past few days:

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On the very first page, it said thi

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s:

Truer words have never been spoken.

One of the questions asked in the first few pages was something along the lines of “when did you become a woman?” A very thought-provoking question.

When and how do you become a woman??

It could be any number of things, from physiological changes, to trauma to getting a driver’s license to having a baby.

It’s different for everybody.

For me, I didn’t start to feel like a woman until I was about 32. It was when, for the first time, a man wanted to spend time perusing ideas with me and going on picnics with me and doing basic life with me. It was when I entertained for the first time in my very own home. It was when I finally got a job where I was treated like an adult.

I had done many “adult” things prior to that.

Around my 29th birthday, I realized that even though I’d been an adult for years, I still felt like a child.

I was fresh out of a very controlling environment and wondering why no one took me seriously.

And then it hit me. The problem was that I saw myself as a child. It’s hard for everybody else to think of you as an adult if you view yourself as a child.

I had to remind myself on a daily basis that I was a woman and not just a little girl playing dress-up with Mommy’s heels.

Reminders like “yes, you can go out for dinner with that guy. You’re an adult now.

Reminders from men that I wasn’t just a little girl; that I was a nice, person who was capable of having beautiful, intelligent and interesting conversations.

Reminders that I’d been doing grown-up things like paying the bills and fixing the car and cleaning the house for years and that means you’re a woman now, not just a little girl.

I had to convince myself that I was actually an adult.

But, I’ve been an adult in survival mode.

When you’re living in survival mode, it’s hard to explore the nuances of what it means to be an adult. A woman.

Now that I think about it, I really don’t feel like a woman and I don’t have a clue what it means to be a woman.

Adult, yes. I can do adult.

Woman? Not so much.

 
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Posted by on May 4, 2016 in Profundities

 

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130 Pounds Squished in a Box

I just finished reading this book:

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It’s about a girl who was put into a mental hospital because she was built like a boy, she liked “boy stuff” and she wasn’t into girlie things.

This is an excellent book, but it did make me question whether I really want to be a counselor for kids.

Because kids who need counselors…. they know stuff.

It’s just a little intimidating!!

I got to the last chapter and she was talking about who she is now and the things that she’s done.

This gave me goosebumps:

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I get that.

130 pounds squished into a box. No individuality. No one sees who and what you are. 130 pounds squished into a box is so easy and so convenient to shove into a corner and forget about.

I think we forget that the moving, breathing, talking things in front of us are people. People with value. People with gifts. Talents. Emotions. Pain. Experience. We get so caught up in our own little world that we miss the subtle ways they cry out for help.

We miss so much. Partly because we’re too busy to look. Partly because we want to see what we want to see. Partly because we have an agenda — a diagnosis to apply, a treatment plan to write up, assessments of whether the treatment plan is working.

It’s heartbreaking how the psychiatrists had this broken child in front of them and they completely missed it. She was falling apart on the inside because of abuse she’d suffered and all they saw was that she didn’t want to wear a dress.

When I’m a counselor…. I hope I can address the real issues more often than not. I hope no child ever leaves my care without feeling like who they are is amazing and they are capable of doing great things.

 
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Posted by on May 2, 2016 in Profundities

 

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Random Thought

You get to read my handwriting tonight.

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Posted by on April 20, 2016 in Profundities

 

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